World's Smallest Fan Club
by The Solar Surfer
Summary: Commission for Mentoria. The SHIELD Helicarrier occasionally hosts school field trips for the kids of NYC. It's supposed to make the public happy. But this time, a bunch of kids accidentally get themselves shrunk down to size while under Spider-Man's care and realize just how dangerous the Helicarrier really is with no hero to guide them. Can they make it out alive?
1. Chapter 1

**Commission for Mentoria - a kind-of sequel to Helicarrier Infestation and Four Little Problems. You don't have to read them to understand what's going on here, even though they have similar storylines with the same characters.**

**Anyways, hope you enjoy. Please read and review!**

**1/30/2014 EDIT: Made some minor changes as to the ages of the tourist group at the center of the trouble. Mostly because of the future trouble they'll be getting into and killing off twelve-year-olds is a bit much to ask for in a Spider-Man humor fanfic. **

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World's Smallest Fan Club

Chapter One

**SHIELD HELICARRIER**

**9:04 AM**

There were only a few occasions when the SHIELD Helicarrier allowed guests on board.

Usually that was only when there were a few superheroes around in need of a hide-out. Others were villains to be temporarily detained until they were shipped off to a more secure prison facility. The only other time was for school field trips.

Surprisingly, it was not Spider-Man's idea.

After New York City discovered that there was a giant floating ship flying around their city, SHIELD's PR department thought it best to hold regular 'open house' sessions that allowed civilians to see certain (approved) parts of the ship, in order to make the public more comfortable with the aircraft and help SHIELD seem more friendly. Because they would look a lot more trustworthy if they gave a bunch of stupid tourists a good time.

One particular field trip in early May nearly ended this tradition of field trips. It was a class of college kids from Brooklyn, all hyped up on the complimentary nachos and soda, who were finally allowed to see the inside of the Helicarrier. Nick Fury assigned his teenaged team of superheroes to the job – punishment after a certain Buckethead decided to blow up the kitchen with his cosmic powers trying to bake a soufflé and no one trying to stop him.

No one was more excited about their new tour guides than the college kids themselves. There was some infighting as to who got to be with whom. Power Man was heavily sought after, as was Spider-Man. While Power Man was cool with having a load of kids on his back (quite literally; they actually started climbing all over him when they realized it was impossible to hurt the guy), Spider-Man was less enthused.

The five idiots he got were loud and obnoxious. It was his job to explain how important SHIELD was to protecting the city and the nation's interests – but all the kids wanted to know was what his costume was made out of, if he fought any bad guys recently, if he was dating White Tiger and what _that_ was about.

Spider-Man, under normal circumstances, would have been more than happy to answer all these questions (and crush any gross ideas of him and Ava being together), but he knew he was being supervised by Fury through the security cameras. If he didn't do his job right, Spider-Man would be made to do toilet scrubbing for a whole month. So he was determined to get this done right, and fast.

The students' names were Jake, Billy, Sarah, Trish, and Mo. Jake wore a red baseball cap and wouldn't shut up about who was Spider-Man's greatest foe, and frequently adding that Spider-Man would have gotten creamed if it wasn't for his team's help. Sarah was a fan of Ava and liked to spout of statistics and facts about the heroes, some of which Spider-Man wasn't even sure was true. Trish was too busy texting on her phone to do much, but she kept asking Spider-Man if he'd take a selfie with her. And Mo...well, Mo didn't say much. In fact, he didn't say anything at all. He just walked at the back of the group, hood up and head down.

Spider-Man was taking them through Level 4 of the Helicarrier, known to those there as the Science and Tech floor. He took them around the main part of the lab, where scientists were currently working on projects.

"Oh, what's that?" Jake would point.

"That's a nuclear particle ray, duh!" Sarah said, rolling her eyes.

"No, it's clearly a thermo-chemical gene cleanser," Billy shouted.

"It's neither!" Spider-Man said over them, before a fight could break out. "It's just a really big electromagnet. Really, that's it."

"Oh." The kids sounded incredibly disappointed.

Well, Spider-Man thought it was over from then on. But little did he know, these guys had more trouble up their sleeves than ants in a picnic basket.

They were passing some rooms full of unused or abandoned machinery when Spider-Man turned a corner, still talking about their top-of-the-line science officers and how they had a great health plan (that did not include getting turned into a giant green lizard), Jake turned around and darted into an open door.

Sarah and Billy watched him go, surprised. Sarah hissed, "Jake, what are you doing? We're supposed to stick with Spider-Man!"

"Come look at this, guys!" Jake stuck his head out the doorframe, waving them over. He seemed completely unconcerned that he was breaking at least dozen school rules, coupled with however many were on the Helicarrier.

"Ugh!" Sarah knew that there was no convincing Jake out of something once he had an idea. She rolled her eyes and grumbled, "Come on, before he does something really stupid."

Billy just rolled up his sleeves. He was on the college football team and was prepared to haul Jake back with them if he had to – although he wasn't that much bigger than Jake, he at least knew how to tackle someone. He went first, and Sarah followed. She went back and grabbed Trisha's arm.

"Wait, you messed up my sentence!" Trisha complained as Sarah started to drag her.

"Just come on!" Sarah grunted, refusing to lighten her grip.

In turn, Trisha grabbed onto Mo, taking the boy by surprise when his hood was snatched and his collar dug into his throat. He let out a strangled yelp as he was pulled unwillingly with the rest of the kids.

All five of them ducked into the room with the open door. It was unusual in the fact that it was the only door in that hall to even _be_ open, much less unlocked. Why was it like that? Who knows. The only thing that mattered was that Jake saw it and the rest were helpless but to follow him. It would take all of them to keep Jake from accidentally killing himself.

"What are you _doing_, Jake?" Sarah whined, hooking a thumb over her shoulder. "We have to get back before Spider-Man notices!"

"Forget Spider-Man!" Jake hissed, throwing his arms to the strange object behind. "Check this thing out!"

All five kids stared at the machine propped up against the wall. It was shaped like a mushroom with a set of buttons on its columns. The buttons were unmarked, giving no clue as to what it did. There was no accompanying booklet or owner's manual either, and the room was completely empty besides the machine.

"What is it?" Billy asked.

"I have no idea!" Jake said, grinning from ear to ear.

"You look way too happy for this," Trisha said, scowling and tucking a dark hair behind her ear. "What are you going to do?"

"I'm just gonna touch it..." Jake said, stepping forward and reaching out with a finger.

"No way!" Sarah said, grabbing onto Jake's shoulder and pulling him back. Billy came to her aid when Jake started to struggle, managing to hold on to the boy and keep him from doing something potentially lethal. "You don't know what that is, and neither do we! Come on, let's go back to Spider-Man before you do something else stupid."

"Yeah, you're gonna get us all expelled." Billy said.

"I still have to get a selfie from Spider-Man!" Trisha added.

Mo just stood there, not saying anything.

"Get off of me!" Jake cried, stomping on Sarah's foot and elbowing Billy in the gut. Sarah yelped and let go, while Billy keeled over with a groan. Jake threw himself at the machine, palms outstretched. "Must touch!"

"Jake!" Trish called. "Stop!"

"Yeah!" Jake cried.

"NO!" everyone else cried, throwing themselves after him.

Jake's palm slammed into the keyboard on the machine, hitting all the buttons at once. A split-second later, four kids slammed into him. Another second later, the room exploded with a bright white light.

It was loud enough to make Spider-Man turn around and realize he no longer had an audience. He looked around, bewildered. "Guys? Where did you go?"


	2. Chapter 2

**I haven't updated this in so long, sorry! Please say hello to a new Agent, who will play second (or third, once Nova shows up) fiddle in this little story. Enjoy!**

**All reviews are appreciated. **

**PS: There are minor changes to the first chapter, so if anything in this chapter regarding the tourist characters doesn't make sense, go back and skim the first. That is all!**

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Chapter Two

**9:30 AM**

**SHIELD HELICARRIER**

Spider-Man stared at the empty hallway, scratching his head and wondering where the hell his tour went in the few moments they were behind him. He looked around, going back down the hall, hoping they weren't planning to surprise him or something. Spider-Man was not a big fan of surprises, particularly when his Spidey Sense gave it away ahead of time and the perpetrators usually got a shot web to the face. How was he going to explain to Fury if a bunch of people got stuck to the walls and needed to be chiseled out?

But that hall was empty, too. There was only one door open here and that led to an empty room with broken machinery. Spider-Man didn't stay in there for very long, not even hearing the tiny squeaks and cries too small to hear.

"Yo, Ava," he said into his comm-link-slash-wristwatch. Her face appeared on its tiny screen, signaling that she was receiving his call. "My tour just ran on me. I don't know where they went. Think you can help me find them?"

"Uh, I'm a little busy here with my _own_ tour, thank you," came her reply, sounding irritated that Spider-Man had managed to screw something up again. "If you want help, ask Nova. It's his fault we're doing this in the first place."

There was an audible _click_ when Ava cut off the line. Spider-Man just scowled at his wrist, displeased with his teammate's lack of teamwork. Where was support when Spider-Man needed it? Was it too much to ask for a little help? He needed to figure out where these kids went and the best way to do that was look at the security footage.

Unfortunately, Spider-Man did not have access to the feeds because the last time he logged on to the SHIELD server, he used it to play Farmville and screwed up the security measures. Spider-Man supposed he could try his hand at hacking, but he was afraid of getting into more trouble than he was already in.

...Nova? Yeah, forget that. Spider-Man wasn't going to ask for his help unless it was an absolute last resort. With Buckethead, progress in any mission was likely to be a one-step-forward-two-steps-back format, and Spider-Man was tired of hearing his voice.

Spider-Man figured his best bet was to head to the Front Deck and get one of the computer geeks to help him find his missing tour. Hopefully, nothing bad would happen to those kids during that time.

Taking a shortcut through the air ducts (and getting chastised by Helicarrier's online system for messing up their ventilation), Spider-Man made a quick two minute trip to the Front Deck, appearing under the desks of some analysts. He surprised them, sending rolling chairs backwards and a few screams crying out "MOUSE!", "RAT!", and "SPIDER!"

"No, no, and yes!" he said, holding up a finger as he pulled himself out of the grate and placed it back before allowing the disgruntled, blue-suited analysts to return to their work.

He headed straight to the one woman who could solve all his problems.

Now, Agent Larue did not reciprocate such feelings for Spider-Man. Like most adults over thirty, she saw Spider-Man as another annoyance to deal with her life, made only worse that he was a responsibility that came with the job. She considered herself better than being the babysitter or on-call support for whatever mistake the teen superheroes made.

Technically speaking, Agent Larue couldn't refuse any request he made, so long as it pertained to some higher goal. In this case, a missing tour group counted, since she could not allow a bunch of slightly older idiots run around this ship, a glorified office building. So she had to act with a level of professionalism, but that didn't stop her from rolling her eyes when the red-and-blue hero walked up to her, looking far too relaxed to ease suspicions.

"_Heeeyyy_," Spider-Man said, shooting her two fingers, Elvis style. That kid thought he was so smooth. He leaned against her computer terminal, probably giving her a smouldering look through that stupid mask of his. "Larue. Long time no see."

"What did you do this time?" Agent Larue asked, not looking up from her screen. She didn't care for the pleasantries – she wasn't hired to be a sweet-talking secretary, she was here to save the world and look badass doing it.

"Wow, straight to the point," Spider-Man said, disappointed. Then again, if he wanted to flirt, Agent Larue was the wrong target to try attempting. "All right, so I was on this tour group guide thingamajig and then this weird thing happened..."

"Did they finally realize you shouldn't be responsible for protecting the lives of two million people?" she asked in complete deadpan, still not looking up at him.

"Ha ha," finally the shmooze was out of Spider-Man's voice and he let his arm drop away from the computer and crossed his arms. Giving up on the idea that he could somehow make himself look less stupid to this woman, Spider-Man got straight to the point, "I need your help, okay? Can you just look at the security feeds and find a bunch of college kids wandering around the Helicarrier? They'll be pretty easy to spot. No ID cards, no clearance, and one of them looked like a serial killer. Think you can handle it?"

"I think you're asking the wrong questions," was her reply. Agent Larue sighed, closing her eyes for a long moment. God, why didn't anyone tell her about this before she joined up? Getting upgraded to Level 5 was _so _not worth it. She'd rather go back to Level 4 and deal with tracking down terrorist chemical transports than this. Then she opened her eyes and said, "Fine."

Getting the security feeds was easy enough. It was within her capacity to maintain some level of security control over the Helicarrier, and getting three screens full of black-and-white images was really the extent of her abilities. Agent Larue supposed she could run a facial recognition to catch the rogue tourists but she wasn't going to make Spider-Man's job easier unless he asked first.

Of course, he did. "Hey, can you do that thing in the movies where they can put in some fancy algorithm and search through people's faces until they find the one they needed? That would be super, thanks."

"Whatever," Agent Larue grumbled, displeased that he was making her do more work instead of just _looking_ himself. Well, it wasn't _a lot_ of work, but still. Were kids these days really so lazy? Or did Hollywood just place bizarre (yet oddly realistic) expectations in their heads about law enforcement capabilities? "Here you go."

She expected the program to work in seconds. She expected the white crossbars to pick up on the tourists immediately, or at least within the first minute, give off a ding sound with location, and send Spider-Man on his was. But none of these things happened.

For five minutes that program searched, even though they both knew it should've taken half that time for it to cover the entire ship. Agent Larue was starting to think there was a glitch in the program, so she started looking for the strange faces herself. It wouldn't be too hard to spot civilians amidst a ship full of agents and scientists, but whoever these kids were, they could play a mean game of Hide and Seek.

"Something must be wrong," she muttered to herself, fingers going to the keyboard to run a scan on her system. "It should have worked. The kids are registered on the system, we have their IDs, but they're not showing up. I can't see them anywhere!"

"Oh, this is bad," as if the Webhead had to tell her that.

"Wow," Agent Larue said with mock surprise, scowling at her screen. "Nothing gets by those keen observational skills, do they?"

"Geez, who spit in your cereal today?" Spider-Man demanded, finally saying something funny. He almost got Agent Larue to smile.

"I don't eat breakfast," Agent Larue replied, opening up another program on her computer. She started typing a message as she spoke. "But that's beside the point. Clearly something is wrong, and those kids are either in a lot of trouble, or they're about to be. I'm going to send an APB across the ship's system, letting everyone know there's a bunch of lost kids somewhere. I'll also send Fury a line, he –"

"Doesn't need to know!" Spider-Man blurted, and suddenly Agent Larue's screen was covered in web. She turned in her seat to complain, but Spider-Man quickly added, "Look, I'm in deep enough as it is, give me a chance to fix it, okay? If Fury finds out about this, I'll be off the team for sure! Please don't tell him!"

Agent Larue pursed her lips, considering his proposition. She ran a hand through her hair, but since it was tied into a thick bun, she could only run it across her head. Spider-Man waited desperately for her answer, blurting, "WELL?"

She casted a glance at the panicking hero. As annoying as Spider-Man was, Agent Larue had to admit that the kid wasn't completely stupid and had saved the day on more than one occasion. Then again, most of things that people needed saving from, were _his_ fault, and this was no exception. Larue was hesitant to hand the reins on this to him, afraid that Spider-Man might screw up it up even worse.

But Agent Larue couldn't do anything, either. She couldn't leave her post without authorization, and to do that she needed to have a good reason. Bathroom breaks barely counted and she already had lunch – someone would notice if she was gone for too long, and quite certainly anyone one else looking at the security feeds (there were at least three people who had that as an official job) would notice her wandering the halls of the ship with no real objective. She was not about to risk a citation and possible demotion for trying to fix a hero's mistake. Spider-Man, however, could go around with impunity and raise no suspicions whatsoever.

So she decided upon an ultimatum: "All right, Spider-Man, I'll give you one chance. You have until the end of Fury's lunch break to find your tour group before I fill him in on the problem. For now, I'll watch from here, in case I see them, and I'll contact you from the comm-link. At least no one can blame me for not doing my job, and if something does go wrong, I can blame it on you for being arrogant and irresponsible. How does that sound?"

"Perfect!" Spider-Man exclaimed, throwing his arms out and surprising her with a hug. While she writhed in his arms, Spider-Man said, "You won't regret it."

"Get off!" Larue practically flipped him over her chair in the attempt to get the super strong arms away. "Next time you touch me, I'm throwing you out the window. If you want to hug someone, get a girlfriend. Now go find those kids!"

"Aye, aye, captain!" Spider-Man said, recovering quickly and throwing her a salute before bounding off. He seemed surprisingly upbeat, although that was probably because Larue didn't tell him that he only had thirty minutes left to catch up with his tour until Fury came back.

Honestly, she hoped he didn't make it.

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**A/N: I realize just now that there is no clear description of Larue, which I'll leave out simply because SHIELD agents tend to look pretty uniform and I don't think it really matters. But in my head as I was writing this I saw her as African-American. But to each their own :)  
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